Bachelorette Parties: The BasicsWho Hosts?Virtually anyone can host a bachelorette party. Often the maid of honor and bridesmaids, who are close to the bride, do the honors, but any friend, relative (a cousin, for example), or even coworkers who feel the urge can plan this party.
The Guest ListShower guests must all be invited to the wedding, but this isn't necessarily true for bachelorette parties. Chances are that most bachelorette party guests -- who are generally the bride's best gal pals -- are wedding guests, too, but it's fine to invite coworkers or neighbors who may not be invited to a small or out-of-town wedding. Just be up front with them about your limited wedding guest list -- you don't want to disappoint any well-wishers. It's usually best to keep this party pretty small -- definitely under 20, and under 10 is probably ideal.
Decide on a DateSteer clear of the night before the wedding -- the last thing the bride needs is a hangover! She'll be nervous enough; she shouldn't have to worry about getting sick. (The rehearsal dinner is usually scheduled for that night, anyway.) If the wedding is in a town other than the bride's hometown, you might want to have the party before she leaves; even if the wedding is local, party at least 2 or 3 nights before the big day.
Plan AheadOne person can plan the entire bash, or several people (like the bridesmaids or the clique from college) can collaborate. Some bachelorette hosts ask for a donation from each guest or co-host, depending on the type of party -- whether you're renting a private room in a restaurant or taking everyone for an afternoon of spa treatments, for example. That contribution may range from $50 to $200, but the bride shouldn't have to contribute a dime. Be reasonable and don't go overboard -- you needn't put yourself in debt over this. A fabulous time can be had by all for little money.
Spread the WordStore-bought invitations will do, or make your own with a desktop publishing program or paper, scissors, pens, and glue. Choose or design with a theme in mind, even if it's as simple as the bride's favorite color. Some hostesses forgo official invitations and just call guests a few weeks before the wedding -- it all depends on the type of party you're planning. If you need to make reservations for a show or other activity, you'll probably want guests to officially RSVP. If you'll be hanging out at the corner bar, scrap the invites -- a phone call is probably fine.
Party TimeBachelorette parties are more laid-back and less structured than traditional bridal showers. There is no "typical" bash, though what usually comes to mind is a group of giggling girls dragging the bride from bar to bar (maybe encountering a sexy male stripper along the way) and making her blush in public. You can paint the town red if that's your style (or, more importantly, the bride's). But there are lots of other ways to celebrate -- a nice dinner at someone's house or a favorite restaurant, low-key dancing at a cool club, a concert (maybe Prince is in town and the bride absolutely adores him) -- the list is endless. The point is to reminisce, laugh, act goofy, and embarrass the bride at least a little (phallic props like wind-up mini penises are hilarious -- as long as she won't get completely offended!).
Tokens of AppreciationThe bachelorette party is not a gift party in the same way a shower is -- presents are not necessary. That said, this is a great opportunity for guests to give the bride silly gifts -- or even sexy ones (like the lingerie that was just too risqué for the shower). You might ask everyone to bring a gag gift (one guest we know presented the bride with a glamorous red wig to wear all night) or something hot -- a book about fabulous sex complete with diagrams, or perhaps a how-to video! Regression is another option -- give her candy necklaces or rings, bubbles, glitter, or a water gun. The goal is for the bride and her guests to just have fun before the wedding.
courtesy of The Knot14 Bachelorette Party Themes & Ideascourtesy of The knotAnte UpLet's face it, marriage is a gamble. So why not hold the bachelorette bash at a casino or racetrack? Most have a nice restaurant, and you might want to see a show or book rooms overnight. The great thing about gambling parties (other than the free drinks) is that some may walk away with enough money to pay for the bridesmaid dresses, a wedding present, or -- even better -- another girls' night out! Just remember the odds are against you, so if betting is your thing, put down only what you can afford to lose.
Pamper PalaceSuggest a day or weekend spa event and send everyone running for their plush terry robes. You'll forgo junk food and alcohol, but those clean pores and exfoliated elbows will be worth it. Choose a full-service spa that offers everything from massages and mud wraps to makeovers and manicures. The bride will appreciate the stress-buster, and you all may find great new looks for wedding day.
Disco InfernoWho said disco was dead? If the bride was a tube-top-wearing ball of Saturday Night Fever energy in the '70s -- or a Studio 54 wannabe, at any rate -- why not whisk her off to a hopping nightclub? Whether she's into "Disco Inferno," "Come on Eileen," or something a bit more contemporary, find a place with the perfect special theme night. (Dressing up is so much fun!)
Hee HawIf she's a country girl, maybe the bride-to-be would prefer a good old-fashioned Virginia Reel. Take her for a honky-tonk night at a country and western bar -- and bring your cowboy boots and hats!
KaraokeIf you've forgotten the liberating feeling of making utter fools of yourselves, lip-synching will be fun for all. There's a reason kamikazes are served in karaoke bars. After all, do you really want to remember your performance?
Let Them Eat CheeseFondue parties can be great, messy fun. Communal pots of melted cheese and chocolate seem to encourage giggles and gossip. Do this at home if you've got the equipment (and people willing to chop veggies, meats, and fruits), or you can reserve a big table at a fondue restaurant. Go ahead and indulge -- don't worry about the calories. This is your night to get down and get cheesy.
It's in the Stars (and the Cards)If the bride knows her Sun and Moon signs, plus her fiance's rising sign, we can predict with almost perfect accuracy that she'll love a New Age party. Hire a tarot card reader and an astrologer to do everyone's chart. This idea can be a big hit -- and not just with the starry-eyed bride. Who doesn't want to know what the future holds?
Coffee, Tea, or -- Tea!If your friend is a paragon of lady-like behavior (with just a few slip-ups about which she's sworn you to secrecy), she may appreciate a Victorian-style tea party, complete with lace doilies, finger sandwiches, petit fours, and scones. You can easily host a tea in someone's home, or if you really want to splurge, go to a fancy hotel tearoom.
Scavenger HuntYou're adults, but that doesn't mean you have to act the parts! A scavenger hunt (complete with clues and a treasure map) will bring out the children in all of you, and prizes can be as grown-up as you like (bottles of champagne or gift certificates for a massage, for instance). Use a friend's house or garden and be as creative as you dare.
Send in the ClownsA comedy club may seem one step up from Chippendales, but it's a recipe for hilarity -- especially when the stand-ups know you're there for a bachelorette party (married sex and mother-in-law jokes will fly!). Call the club in advance and reserve a front-row table. Tell them what you're celebrating, and ask about a group discount if there's a cover charge. After a few stiff drinks, even Al Gore could have you in stitches.
Where the Wild Things AreDoes the bride love the great outdoors? Consider a back-to-nature bachelorette party. Call your state board of tourism to ask about campsites, then ring up locations of interest and ask about rental cabins or tents (if you come up empty, you can rent tents and other supplies at outdoor stores). Also find out what activities are offered (hiking, canoeing, swimming, fishing, or horseback riding). Make sure all guests know what clothes, food, and accessories to pack -- and most importantly, remember to bring toilet paper.
It's Not a DragSometimes a drag show provides just the right kick in the pants. Just proceed with caution: Glitzy drag revues are fabulous dish, but they have ruthless effects on the thin-skinned -- no one is ever spared ridicule.
Cerveza, Por FavorHere's a sure-fire way to make the bride forget about what's-his-name: Take off for paradise. Depending on the time of year, you can get great off-season package deals on island vacations or cruises. Check with a travel agent about availability and special group rates. If guests are limited by their schedules, look into a trip that doesn't require much travel time. With a two- or three-hour flight, you won't waste precious time on a plane when you should be carousing at the tiki bar. If the bride can't fly the coop completely, think about a beach weekend or a few days of skiing at a nearby resort.
The Car, JamesDance clubs, sleazy bars, pool halls, strip joints -- why choose just one? Explore them all in the lap of luxury: a chauffeur-driven limo. Arrange for the car to pick up everyone at a designated location, and you're free to go where you please and drink as much as you please, feeling like important celebrities. Just make sure the night ends at the house, apartment, or hotel where everyone will be crashing, so no one has to drive home. If a limo isn't your style -- or your group is too big -- consider a rental van or chartered bus.
